Thursday, April 8, 2010

FUCKING PISSED

Right now, as I am typing this I have a tear (or two) rolling down my face, next to my nose that I have just wiped off to be replaced by a new couple (I despise that word at the moment). Tonight I am crying because of the realization that two people I have been EXTREMLY open with two self-centered bastards that need to learn there are other people around that are also having issues, maybe even ones more eminent than the ones they are facing.

The first case is one with Katie, fuck it her name is Kathryn! So Kathryn is just a big bitch, and she knows it and knows that we admire her bitchiness, but the problem is that with that bitchiness comes the annoying part that she is also an idiot and self-centered. So the real reason I am just pissed at her is because of those two shitty qualities about her.

Today we were talking after school and we were talking about random stuff, and the problem was that when I stated simple facts about my life that she should by now FUCKING know, she responds with, “I did not know you were in _____” and other similar stuff that I have said a million times and even showed her I was in a million more. This just really pissed me off that she only really noticed that juicy gossipy shit about me, like he remembers I am gay (only had to tell her twice, the second time was to clarify to her I was gay and not bi) and that I have a blog which at any second she could blurt out and my life would end. And that is what really pisses me off, I just hate how she is so gossipy and unable to remember simple things about me. All of that attest to how she is self-centered and it started to get me irritated but not crying.

So what really got me crying was that I have been talking to this other guy who is also self-centered and I am fine with it I know he will grow out of it, at least he better! So I was talking to him and I was telling him how I was irritated today because of what happened with Kathryn, pretty much saying a shorter version f what I said before. And you all want to know what his reply was, and I quote, “Oh gawd.” I then reply “Yeah I know.” And then he said, “Ugh. My hair won’t get it the way I like it.” That is when I got pissed, I did not tell him, but I was. I know it may not seem self-centered to you, but it was to me because instead of trying to help me with the Kathryn situation he just moved on to his hair problem, like fuck cant you at least say, “that sucks, you should tell her you are annoyed at her ignorance of you.” But no! All I got was “oh gawd” and “my hair sucks” and that is what frustrated me and the more I thought about it the more it pissed me off and frustrated me and lead me to shed the most pointless tears in my life because I feel a little neglected and not cared for by the one friend I feel I have, though there is no way she is actually a good friend and the other a guy that is the only one of my blog readers to have actually seen my face and heard my voice at the same time, but I just fell pissed at his immaturity even though I know he is smart and should know to actually try and be a real caring person.

Okay so if you want to try and cheer me up, fine, but I think the big thing that is going to help is that I am leaving for New Jersey/New York tomorrow, so I should be able to get my mind from selfish assholes.

Life Putters and Wanders,

HMG

P.S. Kathryn and other if you are pissed at me right now well then you know why and if you feel bad about me bad mouthing you on my blog, the too bad this is my blog and I have the right to post what I want if it helps me. And I know I am being self-centered right now, but you two know I am not all the time I am just pissed at you, if you want to talk about it you know where you can find me.

2 comments:

  1. Hans

    I hope your trip makes things beter for u. People are tough to figure out sometimes but dont ever stop caring. Someday u will have friends worthy of you

    hope all is well, take care and be safe

    bob

    ReplyDelete
  2. Get over yourself, Not everything is always about you.

    ReplyDelete

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